


made of flesh, made of sand, made of human

by Misprinting (misprinting)



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (2010)
Genre: M/M, except actually most of the time... not so much, here be dragons, here be idiots, human!Toothless, not-actually-bestiality, sort-of wing!fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-01
Updated: 2011-08-01
Packaged: 2017-11-10 12:08:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/466102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misprinting/pseuds/Misprinting
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post!film. Toothless is human. He <i>has wings</i> but he’s somehow human, and now Hiccup’s looking at what he’s looking at he can’t ignore the human legs he’s sitting on, or the human chest the harness he’d made for his dragon is strapped to, or the human skin that’s the exact colour his dragon’s scales should be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	made of flesh, made of sand, made of human

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> Title from Jason Mraz's _Only Human_. To go_hedgehog, for the idea, the help, the enthusiasm, and the beta. Everything that doesn't work or is spelt wrong or is a grammatical eyesore (like this sentence) is mine.

For once it’s not Hiccup’s idea. Snotlout’s the one who suggests they go back to the island; it’s part of his unending struggle to get Astrid to look at him. He thinks it’ll be like a quest, full of danger and excitement, and it doesn’t matter to him that all they’ll find (aside from a giant dead dragon) are thousands of animal bones. He’s decided it’ll prove something.

Hiccup thinks to himself that he’s probably proven enough to everyone for a lifetime, but Fishlegs nudges him and mutters, “we supported you on your quest,” and Hiccup can’t really argue with that.

They saddle up their dragons and head out in the early morning, when any self-respecting Viking is still laid up in bed with a hangover beating against their skull. Hiccup nearly chickens out when Toothless starts to bank away from the volcano as it comes into view, his body shaking beneath him, but then Astrid and her Deadly Nadder swoop in from the side and loop over and around them, playing in a kind of dance and distracting Toothless from what’s up ahead until they’re there.

“Thor’s bollocks!” Snotlout shouts, the sound echoing around the cavern in the mountain once they’ve landed and are standing clumped together, looking around themselves in awe. “I told you!” He says, turning to Hiccup with his chin jutting out, trying to be arrogant in victory but mostly just grinning in shocked awe.

Hiccup only nods. There’s not much to say to the hoard of treasure pilled up underneath all the animal corpses but _Thor’s bollocks_ and _I told you_ , really.

*

There are arguments and there are two matching goblets made of gold thrown at heads (the twins at each other), but finally they agree not to tell anyone from home. It’s not as though Berk has any need of treasure, since there’s nowhere near enough to trade with that has anything much exciting. Besides that, a few dragon scales are good for pretty much anything these days.

This way it’s something they get to keep for themselves, maybe to bring back trinkets for their families and to hide around the town for people to find.

But secret. Just something _shiny_ and precious and essentially worthless that’s _theirs_ , the way the dragons once were.

It feels good, like a guilty little secret that burns the back of their throats when they talk to their parents. A good burn. Rebellion.

*

“Astrid, I found you something.” Snotlout says, handing her a matching pair of gauntlets made of a metal that’s a lighter colour than iron and darker than silver. Astrid takes them from him and examines them, hitting one of them with the tip of her axe and grinning at the sweet metallic clang it makes. She looks at Snotlout and hits his shoulder.

“Thanks, man.” She says, and pulls them on, moving away to show them to her dragon.

Snotlout sighs after her and then sees Hiccup rolling his eyes.

“Shut up, Haddock, or I’ll-”

“I wasn’t saying anything!” Hiccup protests. He laughs weakly and moves around to the other side of Toothless. Turning his head away from his pile of treasure, Toothless snarls at Snotlout. Baring his teeth, - as though he’s the dragon - Snotlout glares for a second longer and then walks away.

Toothless flicks his tail around and it lands in a curve around Hiccup, protecting him, and Hiccup has to duck his head to hide his smile. He picks some bones off a pile of coins and starts to sort them into smaller piles by metal. Toothless is picking out the shiniest, most gold pieces and shifting them into a pile, then lying on them, sighing and fluttering his eyes in bliss with each new addition to his hoard. Hiccup polishes up a gold coin and tosses it too him. Toothless sniffs it and then turns and blinks up at him, purring long and low.

After working his way through a heap of coins and nearly losing his fingers to a very sharp solid-silver dagger, Hiccup’s leg starts to ache at the join between his shin and his metal foot, so he leans his hand against Toothless and carefully lowers himself to the ground. He shifts to lean against Toothless’ back with his legs stretched in front of him. Toothless snuffles his mouth in Hiccup’s hair.

“Hey!” Hiccup says, leaning forward for a coin that seems to be a gem set in gold. He pulls it towards him and brings it close to his face to look. The gem is green shot through with black, and there’s a carving of a dragon on it. Hiccup grins and holds it out. “Hey, Toothless, look!” He says.

Looking at Hiccup as if to say, _but I have gold, human,_ Toothless takes a look at Hiccup’s hand and then twists his whole body to get a proper look at it. He dislodges Hiccup but doesn’t seem to notice, making little excited whining sounds and shuffling closer and closer to the coin, his head following as Hiccup’s hand moves. Toothless smells it and his eyes blow wide. It’s close to the look he gets around wheat.

“Good, huh?” Hiccup asks, wondering at Toothless’ enthusiasm. He holds the coin closer to Toothless’ nose. Toothless gets so close to it that his eyes cross trying to see it, and then he watches it for a moment. He carefully inches his nose towards it, and he licks it.

He sits back on his haunches and closes his eyes like he’s savouring the taste, and Hiccup smiles at him, stands up and reaches his hand out to offer it to Toothless for his pile of gold. But Toothless moves his tail and it sweeps into the back of Hiccup’s knees and sends him forward, falling into Toothless’ chest.

There’s a _crack_ like stone breaking apart and bright hot heat against Hiccup’s hand. Toothless’ wings come up to wrap around them both to protect them against... whatever, _anything_ , and Hiccup grabs hold of his harness with the hand that’s not in so much pain he can’t process it and _clings_.

Toothless’ body falls away from him, and it feels like they’re falling over and over, like falling when they fly together does.

Then they stop. So suddenly that Hiccup’s stomach keeps going and his head bangs against Toothless’ body. He pulls his hurt hand to his chest and pushes himself up with the other, except half way through pushing himself up a part of his brain realises that there’s something wrong. His hand tightens on Toothless’ waist.

Toothless has a _waist_.

Hiccup closes his eyes, and very carefully feels behind himself with his good hand until he touches... wings! _Oh, praise Odin,_ Hiccup thinks, fervent like he’s never been before, tracing along the edge of the wing and smiling in relief. He opens his eyes.

But Toothless is human. He _has wings_ but he’s somehow _human_ , and now Hiccup’s looking at what he’s looking at he can’t ignore the _human legs_ he’s sitting on, or the human chest the harness he’d made for his dragon is strapped to, or the human skin that’s the exact colour his dragon’s scales should be.

Hiccup reaches out and touches, to makes sure, but that’s definitely skin. And just off-centre in the middle of Toothless’ chest is the coin. The skin around it is raised and buckled, like scar tissue, and Hiccup touches the edge very carefully and finds that the coin and skin are fused together. He pulls his hand away.

“What in-”

“Is that...?” Fishlegs whispers. Hiccup looks up to see Fishlegs and Astrid walking slowly towards him, eyes wide, mouths open. “That’s not Toothless. That’s _Toothless!_ ” Fishlegs grabs Astrid’s arm.

“Hiccup...” She says, not even shrugging Fishlegs off she’s so shocked. Hiccup looks back at Toothless and touches the coin again, trying to just... _look_ at Toothless’-. His face. Look at his human face. But it’s too wrong and odd and Hiccup’s eyes keep stuttering over it so he just gets a vague impression of smooth skin and black hair. Small nose, thin lips. Eyelashes.

_Eyelashes._

“Hiccup?” Astrid touches his shoulder very lightly, like he might startle, but he’s sinking too far into shock to be startled. “Hiccup. You need to get off him.” Hiccup turns to look at her, not sure _why_ , basically, because there are lots of things he needs to do and he supposes getting off Toothless’ unconscious human body might be a good place to start, but then there’s also the part where he doesn’t want to not touch Toothless even for a second because _what if he disappears_ , and-. He’s just not sure why he _needs_ to get off Toothless.

“He’s unconscious and we need to find a way to get him back.” Astrid says, slowly. “And...” She flicks her eyes down and away. “He’s not- He’s naked, Hiccup.”

Hiccup blinks. “Oh?” He asks, and Astrid nods. Hiccup nods back, and she offers him her hand.

*

What with the wings and the _tail_ , finding something for Toothless to wear on the way back is impossible. Instead, Astrid removes a blanket from between her dragon and the saddle on her back and they wrap that around him to keep him warm. They tie Toothless’ feet to Snotlout’s dragon’s saddle and then tie Toothless to Snotlout himself with a rope that sits bellow his wings. Hiccup sits behind him and holds onto the rope, burying his head in Toothless’ hair and pretending he’s flying with Astrid until Toothless’ wings get in the way and he can’t forget it anymore.

Hiccup’s dad and half the village are waiting for them when they get back, as they’d been spotted flying closer one dragon short and it’d sent Stoick into a very Viking-like, violent kind of worry. Hiccup helps Snotlout to get Toothless down but then his dad steps in, picking Toothless up like he’s weightless.

He gets Toothless inside and lying, flat on his front, on Hiccup’s bed, and only then does he ask what had happened, looking worried and shocked and unsure.

“I don’t know.” Hiccup says, and finds he can’t look his dad in the eye. He pulls a chair over to beside the bed and waits.

*

Toothless wakes with a bang, starting back against the headboard and already fumbling his hands down his new body with his eyelids stretched wide and his wings unfurling suddenly.

“Toothless!” Hiccup shouts, just trying to get his attention but making Toothless startle and knock over the bedside table with his wings. Hiccup gets his hands up and the movement catches Toothless’ attention. “Toothless, it’s okay.” He whispers, voice too shaky to be really soothing but he’s doing the best he can.

Toothless watches him and almost seems to consciously freeze, pulling his shoulders up towards his ears and hunching in on himself, wings braced protectively.

His eyes are still on Hiccup.

Slowly, careful in a way that he hasn’t needed to be for months, Hiccup lowers his hands and reaches out with one, letting Toothless see it and giving him time to pull back. Hiccup slowly, slowly reaches for Toothless’ arm. Toothless’ eyes follow Hiccup’s hand until it touches him. They both gasp, low. Toothless’ eyes flick up, locking on Hiccup’s and staring, waiting.

“Toothless...” Hiccup starts, trying to think of something to say that’ll offer comfort. But no part of him is prepared for this. It doesn’t matter, though; Toothless is waiting for him to _make it better_ and it’s... it’s not in Hiccup’s nature to fail his dragon, he likes to think.

Not that he’s so very dragon-y now.

“Toothless,” Hiccup says again, carefully moving his hand to gently circle Toothless’ wrist. Toothless doesn’t take his eyes off him, but he very very slightly jerks his head down in a nod. “It’ll... it’ll be okay.” Hiccup promises, and tries not to let it sound empty like it feels in his belly. “I’m here, and I’ll figure this out with you, okay? I promise, it’ll be okay.”

Toothless snorts but doesn’t look away from him, and Hiccup can see that Toothless looks a little hopeful. His eyes are big in his face and they’re the proper green. The pupils are round, and Hiccup’s not sure if they always are now or if they’re capable of becoming feline again. They have white around the irises now, which is new, but they’re still the best way to read Toothless, and Hiccup’s had practice in much more... life-or-death sorts of situations than this, if not more stressful ones.

And that’s the thing: he still knows Toothless, and the way Toothless is looking at him now is not so very different from the way Toothless had looked at him that first day they’d met, when there’d been a weapon and the expectation of three hundred years of a Viking tribe between them.

Now there’s nothing. A stupid magical coin at most.

“It’ll be okay.” Hiccup promises again, and Toothless nods, blinking for the first time. Hiccup notices those _eyelashes_ again; he reaches out to touch without thinking and gets caught with his hand halfway to Toothless’ face when Toothless blinks his eyes open. “Um.” He says. Toothless makes this deep huffing, repetitive noise in his chest that means he’s laughing at him. He stops himself and looks down at his chest in surprise.

“Yeah, that was you.” Hiccup says, laughing back at him until Toothless looks at him with reproach and then jerks his chin forward in a way that usually means, _you_. Hiccup frowns and Toothless makes the noise again, forcing it, and then jerks his chin at Hiccup again. “You want me to _teach you how to laugh?_ ” Hiccup asks.

Toothless squints at him, and Hiccup suddenly wonders what it’s like hearing a familiar voice through _new ears_ and his mind is temporarily blown, so he nearly misses Toothless’ nod. As it is, Toothless is looking at him so expectantly that Hiccup just flounders.

“Well...” He says. “Um. It’s like... You know when- well, no, you don’t.” He looks at Toothless and he realises that he is totally out of his depth. It’s not even like he can go to someone else in the tribe who’s an expert in dragon-human conversion. He _is_ the resident dragon expert.

The front door opens with less of a bang and rattle than Hiccup is used to, but it’s still Stoick in the doorway when he looks up.

“Hi, dad.” He says, trying not to show how grateful he is for the interruption. His dad looks relieved for a second, and then his eyes flick straight to Toothless and he’s wary again and unsure. Toothless taps Hiccup’s wrist, focused on _learning_ , and Hiccup asks, “Dad, how do I teach my dragon-turned-human how to laugh?” without thinking. At the look on his dad’s face - beyond all value, that’s for sure - he breaks out into hysterical laughter.

And that’s essentially how Toothless learns to laugh like a human.

*

Teaching Toothless to walk is easier than Hiccup had feared. He’d thought that Toothless’ wings would overbalance him and leave him struggling to pick up the skill, but it turns out that his tail works as a counterbalance to the wings and it steadies Toothless, keeping him on his feet. The first time Toothless walks the length of the cabin he turns, blinks at Hiccup, and then carefully pulls his lips up so he’s showing his teeth. Hiccup grins back, walking over to him and saying “well done” and “that’s it” like it’s just another trick they’ve managed to pull off in the air.

The first time they go outside, it’s perfect for a few minutes. Toothless walks onto the grass and stares at it where it’s sticking up between his toes. He wiggles them and he laughs his dragon laugh. He realises, stops himself and forces himself to do the human laugh, instead, looking to Hiccup for approval. Then he sees the dragons, swooping around the village and treating it like home, and his face falls. He looks so sad and a little scared, and then Spitelout spots them and calls out, and they’re surrounded by people. Toothless grabs Hiccup’s arm with clumsy fingers and tugs him ‘round behind his back, circling.

“Toothless, Toothless, it’s okay!” Hiccup says, and gets Toothless calmed down. Whenever he sees a dragon, though, Toothless gets this look that’s all wistful and scared, and Hiccup would do anything to change him back just to never have to see that look again.

*

The thing is, though, the books in the village are still outdated. Hiccup spends all his time he isn’t watching and teaching and learning from Toothless with piles of books around him, trying to figure anything out.

But then one day Toothless gets bored and decided to play with fire. He’s not so fireproof anymore and he _cries like a baby_. Hiccup feels so guilty.

“Let us do the research.” Astrid suggests, patting him on the back. Fishlegs had already been helping him and Hiccup knows that of anyone in the village he’d trust those two to find something in a book fastest other than him. He agrees, and he focuses on Toothless again with a single-mindedness that startles even him, when he lets himself think about it.

*

“Can he... talk?” Tuffnut asks, watching Toothless warily. Toothless watches him back, that same arrogant annoyance on his face that he uses on Hiccup whenever he’s being slow.

“He doesn’t like being talked about like he’s not right there,” Hiccup says, “Do you, Toothless?” Toothless shakes his head, still a little jerky and unpracticed, and it’s fascinating: all the simple things Toothless has to relearn in this body. Though the first time he’d needed to pee had not exactly been fascinating, it’d certainly been _memorable_.

“And yet you have no problem with Hiccup drawing you, Toothless?” Astrid asks, leaning on the back of Hiccup’s chair so she can look at his notebook and the sketch of Toothless, human and winged, that’s half-completed on the open page.

Toothless looks at her, narrows his eyes, and then pulls his shoulders up slowly to his ears and, slowly, lets them fall again. Hiccup thinks that’s him trying to shrug, and he smiles at Toothless to let him know he’s doing well. Toothless notices the smile, looks at it, but doesn’t smile back.

“He should be able to learn, though,” Hiccup tells Tuffnut. Hiccup’s been studying him whenever he can since it happened, and as far as he can tell Toothless is pretty much human. He moves like one and breathes like one, and since he can’t actually see inside Toothless’ body he sort of has to go on that and that alone.

Hiccup watches Toothless shift clumsily so his legs are underneath him. There’s a kind of awkward fearlessness to the way Toothless moves, like he doesn’t really believe the body he’s in is his at all. It must be, though: his tail is still damaged.

And that’s as much as Hiccup’s been able to infer about what happened.

“You watch him a lot...” Astrid says, softly, and Hiccup looks at her to say, _of course I do, I have to figure this out!_ But she’s not talking to him. Toothless doesn’t look at her but he does nod, smoother now than before, and stays focused on Hiccup.

_He knows I’ll teach him,_ Hiccup thinks, and it makes him smile. His chest feel tight, too, though. He’s not sure _how_ and he’s scared.

“Can he fly?” Snotlout asks, reaching out to touch Toothless’ wing and getting it snapped away from him in rebuke.

Hiccup shakes his head and gestures to Toothless’ tail. Snotlout still looks clueless but Hiccup doesn’t get the chance to explain because Toothless stands up and takes three long strides across the room, opening the door with a force he’s still not learnt how to handle and striding outside.

“Toothless?” Hiccup calls, pushing himself up as quickly as he can and limping out after him, his leg stiff.

After, he curses his lost foot like never before because if he’d _just been faster..._ But he isn’t, and when he gets outside Toothless is standing at the edge of a small but steep drop, wings unfurled, looking _up_.

“Toothless!” Hiccup shouts, and he tries to get his feet moving in a run only the metal of his not-foot get’s trapped in the material of his trousers, and he keeps his eyes on Toothless even as he falls, flat on his front.

Toothless looks back, eyes wide, but then they snap back to determined and Hiccup loosely translates that look as _watch me_.

Toothless throws himself off the ledge.

He doesn’t die and that definitely wasn’t the point of it; he’d just wanted to _fly_ , maybe wanted to prove to Hiccup that he doesn’t know everything about him just because he’s watched him for a while. Whatever it is, he still breaks a couple of ribs and badly hurts his wrist. He get’s Hiccup’s bed again for a couple of days while he moans and groans and whines in between snarls and growls.

Hiccup stays with him.

“I’m sorry, buddy, I know this scares you,” He tells Toothless. “I’m sorry.”

Toothless just watches him until Hiccup shuts up, but then he lifts his good hand and puts it on Hiccup’s shoulder; squeezes it a little too hard. Hiccup smiles, trembling, but ducks his head, missing Toothless’ reaction.

_I’ll do better,_ he tells himself, and starts to make plans.

*

The village feels festive; it’s coming up to the one year anniversary of the day they killed the Great Dragon and everyone is gearing up for a party that will leave the adults in bed for a whole day.

Hiccup brings Toothless food from the Hall while he’s in bed, and they learn that Toothless doesn’t like fish at all. He can’t eat it raw anymore (he’d spat out a mouthful and it’d landed on Hiccup’s bare foot the one time he’d tried it) and he can’t stomach it cooked, either.

He’s very fond of bread, though, and he likes pheasant well enough, though he doesn’t quite understand the concept of taking the meat off the bone and Hiccup has to feed it to him until he gets the hang of it, so he gets greasy fingers that have been licked by Toothless _thoroughly_.

At least he’s mostly stopped licking Hiccup’s face.

“No!” Hiccup says, when Toothless bends his head to try to reach the bone, snapping his teeth. Hiccup pulls his hand back so it’s out of Toothless’ reach but Toothless has lost interest. He narrows his eyes, concentrating on Hiccup’s mouth, and opens his own.

He makes a choking sound like he’s trying to talk but getting cut off, or trying to _learn_ to talk. He makes a low sound, and then a higher one, and Hiccup laughs, realising that Toothless is playing with _noise_ as a way to communicate.

Toothless stops and glares.

“No, no,” Hiccup says, reaching out. “Don’t stop. You surprised me, that’s all.” Toothless wrinkles his nose and makes a low, low vibrating noise that sounds a little like his purr used to. “You’re so clever.” Hiccup whispers.

They spend the afternoon that Toothless is in bed like that. Hiccup makes a sound and Toothless tries to imitate it, and he gets so frustrated with himself and with Hiccup that he tries to get up and leave a couple of times, but he _gets better_. It’s amazing.

Hiccup feels like he’s actually helping, finally.

*

He’s not sure exactly why he feels it needs to be secret, but Hiccup waits until Toothless has fallen asleep before he sneaks out to the forge. He lights a lamp and spends hours sketching possible designs, trying to find a way for Toothless to fly.

Hiccup screws up the paper when it goes wrong with a little too much force and he throws it _hard_ at the wall, but no one’s there to see.

*

Once Toothless is able to walk without whining - a horrible, higher than high pitched noise that goes straight through Hiccup’s bones - Hiccup asks Astrid for a favour. She looks at him a little weirdly and asks, “Are you sure?” very seriously but finally she agrees. Hiccup goes to find Toothless and brings him outside to where Astrid and her dragon - Fire’s Rage, she calls her, or else Fi - are waiting.

Toothless balks.

“It’s okay! It’s okay, I promise.” Hiccup tries to reassure him by patting his arm but Toothless still looks at him with wide, scared eyes. “I- I just thought we could go for a fly.” He explains.

Hiccup doesn’t understand why Toothless is reacting like this, but he wants to help, so he grabs Toothless’ wrist and just holds on until Toothless starts to look a little calmer. Then he slowly, slowly walks towards Astrid and her dragon. Toothless doesn’t break eye contact once, but he follows him, and when Hiccup climbs up behind Astrid, Toothless closes his eyes but gets on, too.

He wraps both of his arms around Hiccup’s waist and buries his face in his hair. Astrid is tense in front of Hiccup and gives him a long, considering look, but she must see how sure he is of this because she sighs and says, “fine, then” and “hold on!”

They do. Astrid’s dragon snorts and then takes seven fluid strides towards the edge of one of the steep ledges down to the next level of the village, and then she leaps off it and her wings snap up and then down and they’re _flying_.

Toothless clings and pulls his own wings in tight to himself, making little moaning noises like he’s trying to talk. Hiccup frowns. They swoop around and up, up, up. So high the people on the ground look like stalks of wheat and then Astrid loops her dragon around and they start to soar, slow and graceful, across the sky. Hiccup feels alive; he feels like he’s had all the air knocked out of his body and fresh air shoved right in to replace it, and it not being Toothless underneath him doesn’t matter because he’s got Toothless behind him and that makes it better.

He might never get to feel what Toothless feels when he flies, but now Toothless gets to feel what he feels. That’s phenomenal.

But Toothless’ arms are still tight around Hiccup’s waist and he’s stopped making noises that are almost words and instead he’s whimpering, softly, right behind Hiccup’s ear. It frightens Hiccup.

“Astrid!” He shouts, but she already knows. She shoots him a look over her shoulder that makes him feel two feet tall and pulls her dragon back around, easing her down, down, until they swoop back in over the village and slide into a graceful landing on the grass.

Toothless lets go of Hiccup and scrambles off, running before Hiccup’s even got his feet on the ground. He doesn’t even try to follow him, he just sags, like the air’s been knocked out of him again but he’s got none that’s fresh to put back. Astrid hits him.

“Yeah, yeah, that’s for messing it up, I know.” He mumbles.

“Yep.” He swings down and offers Hiccup a hand. She pulls him up from where he’d slumped against Fi and waits until he looks at her before letting go of him. “Be hard on yourself, but not too hard.” She tells him. “You’ve never understood humans as well as you do dragons.”

Hiccup hesitates for a second but has to concede her point. He nods, probably looking pathetic.

“I need to understand, though.” He says, looking up at her and hoping she had the answer. She rolls her eyes and cocks her hip.

“Sweet Odin, Hiccup.” She mutters, looking upwards; praying for patience, presumably. “Do you not think maybe Toothless didn’t like not being in control? He’s only ever flown _using his own wings_ before.”

It makes sense. It makes so much sense that Hiccup is ashamed. He ducks his head, mutters “I’m working on it,” and starts to walk away.

“Good.” Astrid says, her voice a lot softer. Hiccup turns back and thanks her, tripping over himself to apologise at the same time so it all gets a bit mangled and silly, but she smiles and rolls her eyes and sends him off to find Toothless.

Hiccup finds him in the feasting hall, following Stoick as though he’s trying to be his shadow. His wings are still curled in tightly so Hiccup knows he’s still upset, but he’s safe. Hiccup leaves before he’s noticed.

He walks slowly down to the forge, dodging people rolling casks of mead up the hill and others bringing back pheasants and fish for the feast. He finds the forge empty and takes out his sketchbook. He’s had a new idea and he can only hope it’ll work.

*

Hiccup makes Toothless a new fin. Nothing fancy, just brown hide like the first one he’d made and with metal spokes. The only difference is the size, and Hiccup can’t be sure he’s got that right until Toothless has tried it on. But it feels right, and Hiccup’s always had an eye for that sort of thing.

The sun’s set and the moon is on its way there when Toothless comes to find him. Hiccup has stored away the fin and it making some adjustments to his sketches for a system that’ll allow Toothless to adjust the fin himself. It’s complicated but not _that_ complicated. It’s still giving Hiccup a headache.

Toothless opens the door and Hiccup just gets his book closed before he sees it, but he’s only looking at Hiccup anyway. He looks wary and reproachful, but also a little but apologetic, and Hiccup doesn’t like that. He says, “Toothless!” and then “I- I’m so sorry,” but Toothless just ignores him.

He leans into Hiccup’s space, puts an arm around Hiccup’s shoulders ( _for balance_ , Hiccup notes), and snuffles his nose against Hiccup’s cheek. Hiccup closes his eyes and wrinkles his nose, waiting for Toothless to lick him, thinking, _and just when I thought I’d trained him out of it, too_. But Toothless doesn’t lick him. Instead, he inhales slowly and then nudges Hiccup’s check with his nose, and finally, quickly, presses his lips to Hiccup’s skin.

He pulls away and opens his mouth, making a low sound and then choking out, “For.” He takes a deep breath, smiles, and says, “Every. Thing.”

Hiccup’s brain deserts him for a moment. When it comes back, his mind is a mess of _wait, what?_ and _he spoke to me!_ and _no, really, what?_

And then it clicks. _Astrid._

“Oh!” Hiccup says, hearing how high and surprised his own voice sounds with a mental wince. “Oh, Toothless, that’s amazing! You are so _clever_ , oh wow.”

That’s as much as Hiccup’s mind will give him, so he stops and just grins at Toothless, feeling all of his pride push out all the confusion and embarrassment because _Hiccup’s dragon is the best dragon ever_ and that’s the only thing that matters.

Toothless looks unsure, like he’s not sure what he’s done or what reaction Hiccup should have had but like this one isn’t _quite right_. After a minute he pulls his lips into a smile, though, and even that’s getting to be more human; more natural.

Hiccup keeps praising Toothless the whole journey home and as they get ready for bed. Toothless has a mattress set up near the fire but he seems a little uncertain tonight, like- Hiccup doesn’t exactly know, but there’s something about the way Toothless is acting that just feels off.

He gets up as Hiccup is pulling on his nightshirt and comes to stand next to him, touching his arm and then wrapping an arm around Hiccup’s shoulders. Hiccup supposes that if he was feeling generous he might call it a hug.

Hiccup smiles and says, “Well done, Toothless, you’re doing so well at the- you know- the human... thing, tonight. I’m so proud.” Then he sort of manipulates Toothless’ limbs - long and pliant as they are - until they’re hugging properly. He holds it for a minute, sort of hoping Toothless will get the feel of it so he’ll be able to do it again, and then pulls away and gets into bed.

He doesn’t expect Toothless to get in with him.

“Toothless! What the-” Hiccup says, a little too loud for the small house. “What are you-? Where did you learn human affection? Because wherever it was _taught it wrong_.”

Toothless ignores him, getting his arm up between his chest and Hiccup’s back and twisting it so his palm is spread out across the material of Hiccup’s nightshirt. He makes a cute little snuffling sound.

“ _No_ , Toothless!” Hiccup moans. “You can’t sleep here. Go to bed.”

Toothless ignores him. Hiccup tries shoving him and gently elbowing him, but Toothless just dodges the hits he can and ignores the ones he can’t. Hiccup, exasperated and just wanting to _sleep_ , tries climbing over Toothless, planning on just falling asleep on Toothless’ bed. But Toothless catches him around the waist, his hands holding firmly to his hips, and he pulls him back down.

Hiccup feels distinctly like a doll. He gives up then, though only because he needs to sleep.

*

The rigs and the harness part of Toothless’ new flight aide takes another couple of days to finish, and he tests the last piece of rope a couple of hours before the feast celebrating a whole year of being free of the Great Dragon is due to begin.

“Hiccup! We’ve found it!”

Fishlegs and Astrid sweep in, both beaming, and Fishlegs drops a heavy book on a table and points excitedly to a page. Hiccup puts aside the harness and comes towards it, catching sight of what looks like a drawing of-

“It that _the coin?_ ” He asks.

Fishlegs and Astrid both nod and it’s the first time Hiccup’s ever seen them both equally excited, but he really doesn’t matter because _that’s the coin_.

“There should be another one.” Astrid says, pointing to a paragraph where it explains just that. “Probably with a human carved into it.” She traces the dragon sketched on the coin in the book with the tip of her finger. She bites her lip. “Hiccup, I know you’ll want to go and see if it’s back at the island right away, but it’s the feast. And... I think Toothless is looking forward to it.” She looks at him, entreating him.

Hiccup thinks about leaving now, finding the other coin, and... changing Toothless back. It’s... Toothless will want to, of course, but... The idea doesn’t sit right on Hiccup’s chest, and he doesn’t like that but it’s true. Maybe Astrid’s right, though. Maybe he should just leave it until after the feast.

“No, you’re right.” He says, finally. “This can wait until tomorrow. Toothless is excited.”

He picks up the book and the harness and fin and stows them away out of sight. Astrid smiles at him, and he hopes he’s doing the right thing.

*

It’s a feast like no other. The tables are so full of food that in certain sections they have to sit with their plates on their laps. The whole village is there, even the babies and those Vikings so old they have to be carried in. It’s so loud no one can hear anything anyone is saying unless they shout it right in their ear.

“Dance with me, hero-boy!” Astrid shouts in his when they’ve both had a little mead and a lot of food. She pulls him up and outside, where, with the huge doors standing open, the light of a huge bonfire spills into the hall. Astrid pulls him down the steps to where music is being played crudely but enthusiastically and couples are dancing drunkenly.

She spins him and then lets him spin her, and they’re both so giggly and dizzy that they have to hold on to each other for a minute to stay up. They sort of sway a bit after that, and Hiccup sees Fishlegs get dragged out to dance by Ruffnut.

“Haddock, beat it.”

Hiccup is shoved lightly as Snotlout tries to cut in, and Astrid glares at him but Hiccup just rolls his eyes and backs up a step, leaving it to Astrid to deal with. Only someone grabs his arm and spins him into them like they want to dance with him instead.

It’s Toothless. He smiles carefully and holds Hiccup tightly, like he’s not quite sure how, and then steps forward. Hiccup steps back, automatically, and Toothless grins, doing it again, and Hiccup realises that Toothless thinks they’re dancing.

“Toothless-” Hiccup wants to explain that this isn’t... that dancing isn’t... that it’s not really... appropriate, but Toothless looks _happy_ to have done something else human so successfully and Hiccup just doesn’t want to break that. So he ducks his head and moves where Toothless moves him. He’s clumsy with his foot and Toothless is clumsier with his still-new body.

The black of Toothless’ wings gather up around them. They make Hiccup feel safe and protected from the eyes of the village, and he can feel every time Toothless moves them as a tiny brush of air against his cheek.

There’s a break in the music. Hiccup pulls away with an awkward grin and a, “well, this has been nice,” but Toothless ignores him, grabbing his wrist and pulling him away from the bonfire. They walk until they reach the edge of the village, Hiccup’s leg aching from the dancing and then the too-quick walk, and he’s really not thinking at all when Toothless turns and crowds in on him, his wings curved gently around them both again.

He doesn’t touch Hiccup at all until he leans in, shivering, and kisses his lips too quickly.

Or, no, not _too_ quickly. _What?_

Hiccup puts hands on Toothless’ arms to keep him back and looks at him. Toothless is just still, waiting, shivering a little but otherwise unmoving. He doesn’t understand, Hiccup thinks.

“That’s not- Toothless.” He whispers. “I’m sorry, but that’s not- friends don’t kiss _friends_ , Toothless; you’ve got this one wrong.”

Toothless frowns and tilts his head. He shakes it, gently.

“Yes, Toothless.” Hiccup insists. “That’s for... it’s for when it’s... _special_ , okay? Between two people.”

Toothless snorts and shakes his head, angry now and shivering from that. “No.” He says, short. “No.” He gestures between them and looks furiously at Hiccup. “ _No_.”

Hiccup sighs, bringing a hand up to pull at his own hair. “We aren’t special _like that_ , Toothless!” He says. Toothless just goes on glaring and pointing first at himself, then at Hiccup, over and over. “No, we... we’re not- We aren’t _special like that_ , Toothless!” He’s starting to sound a little desperate to his own ears and Toothless drops the glare a little bit. He reaches for Hiccup’s chin, touches it, and leans in, so slowly, and very very gently presses his lips to Hiccup’s again.

It’s not really a kiss but it still _feels_ like one; Hiccup feels wound up and tense and he doesn’t know how to explain this. He pulls away.

“You- you’re a dragon!” He says. Not able to look at Toothless. He can feel his skin flushing pink. “You’re a dragon and I’m human and it’s _weird_ , Toothless, and it’s _wrong_.”

There’s silence for a second, and then Toothless starts up a low, furious growl. He cuts himself off, like he’s remembered he’s meant to be proving how human he is, and he opens a hand against Hiccup’s chest, pressing in the tips of his fingers.

“Can’t. Fly.” He says, giving his wing’s a flap. “Can’t... _fire_.” He whines, quick and wounded. It goes straight to Hiccup’s heart and he feels terrible. “ _Can_ kiss.” He leans his head in so his hair tickles Hiccup’s forehead. “Can... have?” He taps his fingers against Hiccup’s chest and it feels like it shatters Hiccup’s chest apart. He’s not sure he can _breathe_.

Hiccup forces several deep breaths inside his chest and then he looks Toothless in the eye and says, once, very clearly, “No.”

He turns and hobbles away, back home. Toothless doesn’t follow him and he doesn’t come back that night.

*

Hiccup is fine with waking up alone, really, but he starts to worry when still no one’s seen Toothless at midday. He walks around the village slowly, sometimes turning on the spot, hoping to see some sign of Toothless, somewhere or anywhere.

Then he realises exactly where Toothless will be.

He takes the book Fishlegs and Astrid had given him the day before and Toothless’ new harness and fin, and he starts to walk. Halfway to their lake, Hiccup’s whole body is aching; his leg is still screaming at him from last night and now his back hates him, too. He really hopes he knows Toothless as well as he thinks he does.

He has to slide his bag in through the crack in the rock before him and then slide in, undignified and uncomfortable, but then he can push himself off the edge of the rock and land on his good (whole) leg.

There’s no sign of Toothless, but then he’s not looking for a dragon this time.

“Toothless?” He shouts, picking up his bag and clumsily getting it back over his shoulder. He looks around and can’t see him anywhere, so he steps forward. And again. He really, really doesn’t want to have been wrong. “Toothless!”

Hiccup sees the wings first. Toothless stands up and they’re spread like he’s ready to fight. He’s glaring, snarling, and he doesn’t come towards Hiccup.

Hiccup smiles but feels it’s not working - he’s too scared and annoyed with himself for messing this up and he’s _nervous_. He doesn’t want to be nervous around Toothless. It feels all wrong. He takes the bag off his shoulder and lets it fall to the ground. Slowly, looking up towards Toothless the whole time, he bends and opens it, taking out the book.

“There’s another coin, like the one that made you...” He stutters over the word _human_ after the way he’d used it last night, but shakes himself, forcing himself to smile. “That made you human. It’ll be identical but it’ll have a man carved into it instead of a dragon. We think it’s probably back at the island.” He stops, gulping, and looks away from Toothless for the first time. “I could- I want to help you-”

Toothless starts to growl, low but loud enough that the sound carries. Hiccup takes a step back, then remembers himself and takes out the harness and the new fin. He lays them out on the ground, talking as he straightens the ropes out.

“This is- You should be able to fly. On your own, with this.” He points to a grip that’s connected to ties that are attached the the fin. “You use this to change the fin position. It’s a little- I could show you-” Toothless growls again. Hiccup nods. “Or you can figure it out yourself. Um.”

He takes a couple steps back, taking his bag with him but leaving everything else. He looks at Toothless and wonders if he’s eaten. He should have brought some food for him.

“I’m sorry, Toothless.” He says, and then he turns and walks away. When he gets to the gap in the stones that serves as an entrance, he turns back and sees Toothless’s wings spread out wide, still. He’s got his back to Hiccup.

It’s tempting to stay and watch him try to figure out how to use the harness, but Hiccup knows he wouldn’t be able to stop himself trying to help, and that would only end in disaster. He walks home.

*

Hiccup doesn’t see Toothless except in the feasting hall at night sometimes for several days, but Astrid tells him that he comes to her for help. She keeps him up to date, and Hiccup might not know about every scratch Toothless gets anymore but he knows when he finally manages to fly on his own again, not going far but still; _flying_.

The idea of Toothless flying without him hurts _a lot_ , too much, but Hiccup reminds himself that he’d hurt Toothless too. Maybe this makes them even, and maybe it doesn’t, but Hiccup pushes away the hurt because they don’t need it complicating things further.

It’s twilight on the fourth day after the feast when Hiccup steps out from the forge and sees Toothless, flying above him. He’s _beautiful_ , swooping over Berk and holding his head high like everything beneath him is his. Hiccup watches him swoop up and over his own house and then across and around the feasting hall, and then he beats his wings, rising up across the village and out across the sea. Hiccup holds his breath, but Toothless is safe. He’s going to be fine.

Toothless doesn’t look back as he flies away from the village and Hiccup doesn’t look away from him until he’s gone.

“I think he’s gone back to the island.” Astrid tells him, taking his hand and squeezing it. Hiccup nods. He’d already known that.

“I’ll wait.” He says, and she smiles and elbows him gently, teasing him but Hiccup can’t smile back.

“Of course you will.” Astrid says.

_Exactly._

*

No one expects their dragon to knock on the front door when they come back after over a week of questing, so Hiccup expects it so be Astrid or Gobber, but when he opens the door there Toothless is. Human still. Shirtless, oddly, but Hiccup supposes it must be easier for when he’s actually using his wings. They’re pulled in to his side and Toothless looks at Hiccup with a ducked head and cautious eyes.

Hiccup feels his chest expand in a rush and he reaches out and grabs onto Toothless, holding onto him tightly and pulling him into the tightest hug he can. Toothless doesn’t tense or pull away. He lets Hiccup pull him and then stays still for a second. He sighs, and he carefully, cautiously puts his arms around Hiccup’s waist.

“I missed you. Like, a lot.” Hiccup mumbles, and then realises how ridiculous he’s being and pulls back, fumbling and shuffling awkwardly. Toothless pulls his mouth into a shape that Hiccup thinks means he’s upset, maybe, and Hiccup looks away and steps back, his metal foot clunking in a way that makes him wince like a slammed door might. “Um.” He says, and then just stares at Toothless, feeling so _disconnected_.

Toothless puts a hand in the pocket of his trousers and pulls out a coin. The coin. Identical to the one still shining on his chest, and Hiccup finds himself just staring dumbly between the two. Toothless snorts and picks up Hiccup’s hand, looking at the coin and then pressing it into Hiccup’s palm.

“You-?” Hiccup asks, curling his fingers around Toothless’ hand over the coin and staring at it. “Oh. What do I-?” But he thinks, maybe, that it’s just a logical thing. Toothless can’t change himself back; that’s not how it works. Hiccup has to touch him with the coin, maybe. Hiccup’s not sure. He really doesn’t have a clue, actually, but _maybe_.

Toothless pulls his hand back and pushes his chest out, looking at Hiccup head on. Hiccup looks at him, too; holds the coin with his fingertips pressing against the groves in it, making tiny indentations in his skin. He looks at the coin on Toothless’ chest.

“I just... you should probably know, Toothless.” Hiccup says. He shivers and realises they’re still standing in the doorway. He bites his lip. “Just. I was wrong. I’m sorry.” He looks at Toothless’ wings and touches one with a fingertip. It quivers. “I guess... I suppose I just had trouble accepting that... You’re human when you’re human.” He smiles tightly. “And that’s kind of it. Either you’re human or you’re dragon and either way you’re still _Toothless_ and we d-” Hiccup looks away and coughs, pulling at his ear lobe. “We are special.” He says. “You and me.”

Toothless touches his shoulder and Hiccup looks up at him. Toothless has wide eyes and his nostrils flare like he’s trying not to breathe hard, but he nods, once, very very seriously. Hiccup laughs and then cuts himself off in a way that makes him sound a little wounded.

“No, but, um.” He says, looking at his feet. “If- if you want to be a dragon again.” He sighs, frustrated with himself for finding it so hard to say. “You can be.” He thinks about that and looks up at Toothless with a wry grin, tapping the coin in his hand. “If, you know. If this works.”

Toothless snorts again and flicks his tail so it lands in an arc around Hiccup, who has to duck his head to hide how much it makes him want to laugh or cry. Toothless opens his wings, curling them around them both, and says, voice gravely, “ _Can_ fly.” Hiccup looks at him and he’s smiling. “ _Can kiss_. Dragon-” He stops frowns, opens his mouth a couple of times, and then says, haltingly, “Dragon only can fly.”

“ _Can only_ fly.” Hiccup corrects, automatically, because he feels a little too stunned to think. Toothless nods, starting to frown.

“Only can fly.” He says again, and then, “Yes.”

Hiccup laughs. _Such a stubborn, stupid reptile._

“You don’t-” Hiccup starts. “I mean, I think, if you wanted, you could sometimes be a dragon and sometimes be human. If you wanted. _If_ it works.” He looks at the coin in his hand so he doesn’t have to look at Toothless because it’s getting a little _intense_. But Toothless makes a whining sound and touches Hiccup’s chin.

Grinning nervously, awkwardly, Hiccup looks at him and tries to act like none of this is any sort of a big deal at all. It is. It so is. He feels like his heart’s going so fast it’ll run out of blood to pump ‘round him soon.

“Human now.” Toothless says. Hiccup hesitates but then nods back, not sure what Toothless means. But then Toothless reaches out and puts his hand around Hiccup’s, closing Hiccup’s fingers around the coin and then pushing it back towards Hiccup’s chest. Toothless nods at him, like that settles it, and Hiccup thinks that maybe if Toothless knew how to say the words _keep this_ or _for safe keeping_ he’d be saying them now.

Hiccup nods, slowly, hesitantly, and smiles, feeling all shy and awkward and on the cusp of a great bubble of happiness. He shivers suddenly from the cold and Toothless frowns. He takes hold of Hiccup’s shoulder and pushes him back inside the house, closing the door behind him with his tail. Hiccup laughs nervously.

“That’s actually incredibly useful.” He notes. Toothless ignores him, stretches out his wings as far as they’ll go and then _uses them to pull Hiccup towards him_. It’s... _wow_. Hiccup finds he’s a little breathless once he’s been pushed up against Toothless’ chest with his arms pulling him closer and Toothless’ wings around him. “Right.” He says. “Um.” He looks up towards Toothless’ face and actually he has quite thin lips, and they’re sort of shockingly pink when he opens his mouth, and his teeth are _so white_ and _oh. Oh, right._

Toothless smiles at him, and he touches Hiccup’s nose with his own, gently brushing them together, and says, clearly, “Can have Hiccup.”

Hiccup smiles. That’s always been true.


End file.
